About Karl Stenske Counselor Irvine

A Therapist Who Truly Gets It | Counselor in Irvine

Beyond Credentials: Can I Trust This Person?

Finding the right therapist is harder than it should be. You can read credentials all day long, but what you really need to know is: Can I trust this person? Will they actually get it? What is it going to feel like to sit in a room with them?

I get it. Choosing a therapist is vulnerable. You’re not just looking for expertise—you’re looking for someone who can hold what you bring without flinching. You need someone who won’t make you feel like you need to perform or explain yourself, but someone who genuinely sees you.

That is the space I aim to create in every session. I’m Karl Stenske, a licensed marriage and family therapist and counselor in Irvine. I’ve been helping individuals and families with their attachment needs for 15 years, and I still love what I do. Not because I have all the answers, but because I’ve learned how to create a space where real healing happens—where you can finally feel safe enough to stop pretending and start being honest.

Why I Do This Work: Lived Experience & Clinical Depth

I didn’t grow up planning to be a therapist. But life has a way of pointing you toward what you need to understand.

For years, I carried things I didn’t know how to name. Disconnection. Questions about belonging. Wounds I couldn’t quite locate but felt all the time. On the outside, everything looked fine. But inside, I was quietly searching for something I couldn't articulate.

Everything shifted when I began my own healing work. By facing the losses and identity questions that shaped me, I experienced what it’s like to sit with someone who truly sees you and says, “I understand. And we can work with this.”

That changed everything. Today, I bring both clinical training and lived experience to my work as a male therapist and counselor. I hold two Master’s degrees—one in Marriage and Family Therapy and one in Adoption Studies. I’ve directed foster and adoption agencies, trained other therapists, and spoken nationally.

But honestly, the work I’m most proud of happens quietly in my office every week: helping people make sense of their stories so they can finally move forward.

How I Can Help You Heal:

• Relational Trauma: Untangling the wounds that keep you guarded, reactive, or exhausted.

• Couples & Attachment: Moving from disconnection and "stuck" patterns toward emotional safety and repair.

• Adoption & Identity: Navigating the complex echoes of early separation and the search for belonging.

I don't offer quick fixes or surface-level advice. Instead, we do the deep, relational work that actually lasts.

What Working Together Feels Like

I don’t do "generic" therapy. I’m not interested in just nodding and taking notes while you wonder if anything is actually happening. I show up fully present, I ask real questions, and I help you make connections you haven't been able to see on your own.

I’m not afraid to go to the deeper places when you’re ready—but we go there together.

Emotional Safety with a Grounded Presence

Many of my clients—especially those working with a male therapist for the first time—express that they’ve never experienced this level of emotional safety with a man. I bring a calm, grounded presence to the room. I don’t flinch when things get heavy, and you don’t have to worry about whether I can handle the weight of your story.

Moving at Your Pace, Not Mine

I won’t push you into anything before you’re ready, but I also won’t let you stay stuck in patterns that aren't serving you. We’ll slow things down enough to understand what’s happening underneath the surface, moving at a pace that feels safe but productive.

Understanding the Whole Picture

I don’t just treat symptoms. Whether we are navigating relational trauma or couples therapy, I help you see how everything connects—your past experiences, your attachment patterns, and the wounds you carry. When you understand your story, you can stop feeling confused by your reactions and start living with clarity.

Healing Beyond Words

Sometimes the deepest healing happens in your body, not just your thoughts. To reach what talk therapy alone can't, I utilize Brainspotting and somatic approaches. When words aren't enough, we work with the wisdom your body already holds.

Who I Help: From "Getting By" to Real Change

As a male therapist and counselor in Irvine, I work with individuals and couples who are ready for more than just "venting." My clients are people who have tried to figure things out on their own and realized they deserve professional support.

They are tired of repeating the same patterns and are ready to trade emotional disconnection for deeper, more meaningful relationships.

I specialize in helping you navigate:

• Relationship Struggles & Disconnection: Using Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) to help couples move from constant conflict or "stuckness" toward emotional safety and repair.

• Trauma & Attachment Wounds: Addressing the quiet pain from the past that continues to echo in your adult life and relationships.

• Adoption & Identity Challenges: Navigating the unique complexities of belonging, loss, and identity that come with the adoption experience.

• Breaking Deep-Seated Patterns: Identifying and shifting the reactive behaviors that keep you from feeling like yourself.

Many of my clients specifically seek out a male therapist. They are looking for a counselor who can bring emotional depth without being overwhelming, strength without rigidity, and genuine warmth throughout the process.

If that resonates with you, we might be a good fit.

Take the Next Step

You don’t have to keep carrying the weight of your story alone. Whether you are looking to repair your relationship, process a history of trauma, or navigate the complexities of adoption, I am here to help you find a way forward.

Let’s connect to see if we’re the right fit for your goals.